How Using a "We/They" Perspective Can Drive Success in 2025
One of the methods I've used that is highly effective with challenges that involve interpersonal issues, is using a "We / They" Perspective. At first glance, this could be misinterpreted, so let's dive in before we have any miscommunication to address within our community. :)
Note: There are a lot of references to "clients" in this article. This could be anyone at work or in your personal life where you're trying to resolve an issue, as this problem-solving approach is effective for lots of different situations. Please email me if you run into problems or have questions!
There is a preferred industry consulting approach where you work with a client in a neutral way, as an observer. You find out what the client wants to change (the current state) and what their goal is (the future state), and then your job is to sort out how they get from point A to point B. I've over-simplified it a bit, but you get the picture.
My experience is that people may be skeptical of you for asking around but not seeming as if you are vested in the situation. I adapted my approach and have received a lot of positive feedback from clients, with much of that feedback focused on my kindness and the care I put into the solution and making sure it met their needs.
You catch more flies with honey, as they say.
Personalities almost always play into how the current state came to be. Some people will start out with a mindset against change, even if it is good change. Gaining buy-in from the impacted people is critical from the beginning of a project where you're looking to change outcomes. This is where "We" perspective pays off.
Don't try to look at the situation from the outside. Get in there. Be part of it.
Embracing the "We" perspective is about immersing yourself in the backstory of the current state. You don't just want the facts. Understand the pain points, and all the stuff in between.
You also want to understand the why, the how, and find your empathy and compassion for the situation as much as possible so that you truly understand how the present situation became what it is.
This means actively listening, asking clarifying questions, and striving to grasp the historical factors, internal dynamics, and external pressures that have led them to their current state.
By viewing the situation through the client's lens – by becoming part of their "We" – a consultant gains invaluable insights into their pain points, their motivations, and the underlying assumptions that influence their decisions. This empathetic approach fosters trust and demonstrates a genuine commitment to understanding their unique circumstances.
Once you fully understand the "We" perspective, it is time to shift gears. Taking the "They" perspective is putting that objective hat back on so that you can take on a more detached, analytical perspective to think through the path to resolution (or whatever the desired future state is).
The difference here is that you have informed yourself of the "We" point of view, so you will already have some challenges in mind that must be addressed through the solution for it to succeed in the client's environment.
Your "They" perspective solution will be more strategic, more specialized, more prescriptive to the client's needs.
The "They" perspective allows for the application of specialized knowledge, industry best practices, and innovative thinking, offering fresh perspectives that might not be readily apparent from within the client's day-to-day operations.
Ultimately, the most impactful consulting engagements seamlessly blend these two perspectives. The initial immersion in "We" builds rapport and ensures that the proposed solutions are relevant and grounded in the client's reality. The subsequent shift to "They" provides the necessary objectivity and expertise to chart a course towards the desired future.
This dynamic interplay between empathy and analysis is the cornerstone of effective transformation, the result of a collaborative and impactful partnership.
